Miss Kolka

Im often asked if I miss my tummy - mostly by other pregnant women. And I have to admit it was something I had thought about myself. But no - although you become one with your pregnant identity, losing the stomach is strangely comforting and quite a relief. Actually the baby takes over pretty much everything and what I do miss is time. I never seem to have any time anymore. Time to do all the things Im supposed to do, or when I decide to do them there is a diaper to change, a bottle to give or simply attention to be given to the little one. Sometime it is way pass tea time when I realise I was going to take a shower that day - that will simply have to wait. Well I'm told this is how it is in the beginning. And its ok. Its amazing how you adapt to different situations and frankly, one little weird baby face or sound makes it all worth it.

And the little time you have left - you should use it to take a nap, not spend it on blogging something noone will read anyway. And so I will.

So this has been a hectic week...

Gave birth to a baby, got back to work 5 days later, had a few meetings and have never looked better in my stilletos.
No - not really, Im not Rachida Dati (France's Justice minister) and I am SO not back to work.

When I heard about and saw on the news Dati's return to the political scene only 5 DAYS after giving birth to a baby girl by caesarean,I must say I wasn't just shocked, I was horrified. There she was, little miss sexy in her dark suit and high heels, smiling to the cameras, showing that she surely did not need to bond with her baby or spend some time with it. Her job was more important. A personal choice some might say. I think it's more like a reflexion of how motherhood is seen in France and where women stand in the french workplace. The discussion following this highly mediatized and sometimes praised return proves it.

Having had my own baby the day before, and stayed at the hospital 5 days I can very well put my self into her shoes. I have always worked my arse of and be dedicated to most of the jobs I've done. Before being pregnant I practically lived for France 24 and gave it all I got. But in my mind - I always knew how important family and children were to me and that I was ready to make sacrifices when the time came - mind you perhaps a bit earlier than planned but I was still ready for it.
Having had spent one half hour away from my own little Mr. F since his birth, I know that I never would have been able to do what missus Dati did. Call it cowerdness if you like, I call it responsability. If you decide to have a child, its not like buying a new bike, it takes time and effort (believe me I know) to feed it, show it the love it deserves, taking care of all its little needs and just be there for the first hard days in its existence. Its not easy to be trown into the daylight after having spent 9 months in the safest place there is. A babysitter can not substitute for motherly (or be it fatherly) warmth.

Im also horrified because it actually confirms what I have been observing in my work environment and the French society as a whole for the last 3 years. Women and men are not equals. Women seem to have to prove themselves all the time, seduce men even and the market is not made for a balance between family life and career. This case proves it once more. What kind of example is it to French women (or employeurs) that a high profile minister doesn't feel comfortable to take her own maternity leave?(which has to be said is no god's gift in France, only 8 weeks for women and 14 days for men! Compared to the 6- 12 months in scandinavia) That she is ready to sacrifice the first few crucial days with her child to seduce the media and prove to her chauvanistic boss that she is one of the "gang" and she doesn't need special treatment, is that in some way bravery? I dont think so, I just think its sad, but then again I only judge from my perspective.

A mother and a minister? I dont think so. A minister perhaps, but the act of giving birth to a child does not make you necessarily a mother.

and he's our little golden viking!

say hello to Mr F.

The best for you all in this exciting new year!

Kolka og Pan

... that it is very likely that I go into labour in the next few days..

I have the "feeling" babylicious wants a cool birthday and therefore is planning, all by itself of course, without any medical help hmm hmm, to introduce itself to you on the first day of the new year.

how exiting!

stay tuned...

• Who's Anatomy? | 24-11-2009
• Here we go again. | 19-11-2009
• Of Sex, Violence and Bad men | 08-10-2009
• of Bloggers and other creatures | 05-09-2009
• swineflu - what are we to think? | 13-08-2009
• Was it for an underwater Rock concert? | 11-08-2009
• The city of the Happy People | 04-08-2009
• Felix meets Loulou | 21-07-2009
• This is Iceland! | 13-07-2009
• Popularity! | 22-06-2009
• Aurevoir..mais pas Adieu! About Burqas, Sarkozy and all that | 22-06-2009
• ... | 18-06-2009
• What's happening? | 18-06-2009
• Reminder | 15-06-2009
• What can Europe do? | 08-06-2009