Name of the picture above: "Gender equality in Sweden"

Today is Women's day as google is so good reminding us. Some people do not need a reminder. I cannot help but think that since there is an international Women's day however, there should be one for men too.

Sure, we are far from having achieved what our mothers and grandmothers hoped for us. There are still so many battles to take on for women to get the  same acceptance in society or even basic human rights in some countries (without mentioning the constant battle for power positions, salary equality and same chances of participating in governance) that at times it feels disheartening.

But the war against inequality cannot be won without men. They have to participate in the fight. Even if it is only for their mothers, wives, sister or daughters.  But really, they should fight for themselves. Men have to fight for their right to prioritise their children and families over work if they want to, without being judged, for being accepted as sensitive beings that can and should have feelings about alot of things, of not being expected to be the ones that have to earn a higher salary or be the main provider for their loved ones, or whatever else men feel they have lost by the empowerment of the other half of humanity. Yes men and women are different but that is alright. It doesnt mean one should take over the other. This is a war where the goal is to change our cultural perceptions and I think one of the first steps must be to change the idea that "same" is necessarily the best. (i.e. "women" qualities can just as well be acceptable for leaders as "men" qualities are. but that is for another time...)

Let me tell you a little story. When I was 10 years old I had a birthday party like any "normal" kid would. My mum had made me a pretty skirt out of this ballet material that was so in fashion at the time. At first, I doubted about the skirt as it was not bought from the shop and exactly the same as all the other girls had on. I wasn't sure either about the red juice we served with the cakes as all the other kids always had coke or sprite or fanta at their birthday parties. I was so insecure because I was so desperate to fit in. With my crazy eyebrows, weird name and French father I stood out in a small community that was and still is used to everybody fitting the same mould. Still, that is nothing, I can only guess how people of other skincolour, culture or sexual preferences must feel when judged by people convinced that their norm is the way to go. But I would not change all those moments of doubt and insecurities for anything in the world! If you see my closet now - there are so many pretty, unusual dresses that nobody else would ever wear that I can't even close it! Growing up I used to love having grenadine syrup and still do - so if I am not up for coffee (like any normal person of my age should have when in le Flore) I order a "diabolo grenadine" because i really do not care what other people think about me. I feel I am extremely fortunate having grown up in two different culture and lived in different countries in different circumstances. I feel you learn alot from meeting people that are different from you and I am working on trying to understand things that I do not agree with (having strong feelings about many issues) but ultimately I hope to be able to teach my children tolerance for people different from themselves. Being boys, I  hope they will not feel they have to do whatever else the others are doing. It is not because everybody else is doing it or it has been like that forever that it makes it necessarily alright. 

Its not because women have been the ultimate caretaker in the home since forever that it has to be like that until the end of time. But cultural habits are hard to break. Just last saturday at a family gathering, while the hubby got (deserved) attention for all that he does at home (cooking, grocery shopping, washing and sometimes picking up the kids by himself) while the missus is at work, I felt judged by the other women at the table. "Gosh, he really IS the perfect husband, isn't he?" or "Wow - how amazing". Yes he is amazing, but does it mean I am a bad mother and wife- not fulfilling my role as a traditional woman? Why am I even asking myself that question? If I had flexible workhours and we would turn the roles around, how many men would have looked at me in awe over all I do at home WHILE working a full time job? I guarantee you, not many.

The battle goes on - so lets celebrate today with a video of acceptable woman behaviour (below) - and continue tomorrow